California Dreaming

News Flash. The remarkable governor of California, a man to be reckoned with, married to one of our very own princesses, a man who can ride a motorcycle and shoot a gun and save the punk kid savoir of mankind all at the same time while looking real cool with his shades on has now reached for the stars and modestly asked you and me, us and them, the citizens of the other 49 states, the humans that made him a very wealthy man, to loan our good names and cosign his debt.

TheFundamentals believes in self reliance. Self reliance is simply defined this way – bankruptcy, pal. Embrace it. You will find your salvation at the steps to the federal courthouse. Forget about loans and more debt. As General Powell said so brilliantly and simply, you fool, “You broke it, you own it.”

Here’s another suggestion: (as usual TheFundamentals seeks no remuneration for these ideas that politicians pay handsomely large consulting fees for in their constant quest to seek the best advice) Have a garage sale. TheFundamentals is not sure what you’ve really got out there but put it up for sale on EBay and Craig’s List. See the bridges, sell the canyons, and sell the views. Sell all those crappy mansions hanging onto the edge of a cliff and that park where that lightened up fellow with the barely hanging on nose lives. Sell those welfare rolls. Sell your constitutional amendment process and your gay marriage ideas. Sell your airports and your highways. Sell the movie lots. Sell your silicon valley and Yosemite park. Sell death valley desert; hey the Arabs are big on sand and they gots lots of dough. Sell your emission standards and your public sector union benefit packages. Sell your vineyards and your artichoke farms. Head on down to the federal court and have at it. They love to liquidate. Sell it all. Sell the islands – Catalina and Alcatraz.

Are you feeling lucky? Ah’ll be back. Sell the movie lots. Sell the big tall trees. Sell the marijuana farms and the hippie hangouts.

As the community organizer says, “It’s time for change.” Sell it all. You’ll get some change.